that little voice in the back of your head... you know, the one you don't want to listen to ever because it thinks your brilliant ideas are really dumb?
-yeah, listen to it.
so my cat has a urinary tract infection and is peeing all over my house. (which is really awesome, i'll have you know.) one of his most favorite places to relieve his urinary anguish is on my shoes. or OUR shoes, as the case may be....
well, between the dog-poop landmines and the urine surprises, my lover is running out of shoes to wear, and being the adoring partner i am i was committed to thoroughly washing them and allowing for him to have a vast selection of footwear options available for tomorrow.
the washing process went well, despite the fact that i dumped vinegar into a washing machine with a baking soda based detergent inside.
then came the drying...and the voice.
"whoa, you're not actually going to do what you're thinking of doing, are you?" the voice asked.
"look voice, it'll be fine. i've done it before..."
"uh-huh. sure. this is a really dumb idea. a really BAD idea. i'm kinda ashamed to share the same cranium as you right now."
"ok voice, that's quite enough. i know what i'm doing, and i don't need your sass. zip it."
silence
feeling resolute and assured i continued on with my mission. i was on a roll, making great progress and even greater time.
but the dryer cringes at my haughty glee...yet says nothing as i load the 6 pairs of wet, heavy shoes inside.
though i can feel its fear and misery...
feeling still accomplished i continued on upstairs happily going about my business while the shoes thumped and banged about in the dryer like a rolling freight train.
...when suddenly, with one final warning, the dryer spoke to me...with silence.
"uh-oh." i thought "was the voice right?"
upon returning to the basement i discovered the shoes had opened the dryer door, thus stopping the machine.
feeling quite haughty let out a chuckle, closed the door and resumed the drying cycle.
as i pushed the button the voice had one final taunt,
"man, you are an idiot."
about 15 minutes later the dryer once again fell silent , and once again i went down for an inspection.
this time the door was secure.
this time i was worried.
i tried a number of combinations for a quick solution.
the dryer stood defiant in deathly silence.
"i killed the dryer, didn't i?" i said to myself.
if the voice has a head, i'm sure it was shaking it at me in pity.
"you're a flippin idiot" it said,
then left me alone with my moderately wet shoes
and shame.
Thursday, September 22, 2011
Wednesday, September 21, 2011
need
oh dreary day
how thankful am i that you laid your grey damp blanket over these hours.
today is no day for sunshine
today is made for you, my dear
and your cold, wet embrace.
sometimes i think our human brains betray us more than we'd care to admit.
around every corner another cell claiming the glory of judas
and the rooster continues to crow...
all these collected lifestuffs
junk, really
junk i've squandered my time and money on
until i have none...save the junk.
and now i want it gone.
but i'll carry it on my back
just like the junk lady
and claim that it's vital.
why do we work?
for these things...this collected junk.
we say we need to eat, we need shelter
but in what capacity?
surely not the way we think we do.
and i am learning that now, as i struggle to pay off junk i no longer even own
along with the junk i do...
...wondering why i ever though i needed all of it in the first place.
and what of "need"?
what a strange creature it it is.
like a woman with may children
the mother of all need being simple: food, protection from the elements, oxygen
then there is her lover: companionship, comfort, knowledge....
and all their little bastard children: status, power, safety, stability, peace of mind, on and on...
and these children have all inbred and had mutant children of their own, like clothes, books, ipods, cars, blenders, washing machines, sofas, ice cream, matches...
we all choose which needs we invite to live with us.
i need to ween out the bastard children and their mutant spawn.
and be left with just the woman and her lover.
eating in a house
breathing each others breath
and understanding the profoundness of it all.
how thankful am i that you laid your grey damp blanket over these hours.
today is no day for sunshine
today is made for you, my dear
and your cold, wet embrace.
sometimes i think our human brains betray us more than we'd care to admit.
around every corner another cell claiming the glory of judas
and the rooster continues to crow...
all these collected lifestuffs
junk, really
junk i've squandered my time and money on
until i have none...save the junk.
and now i want it gone.
but i'll carry it on my back
just like the junk lady
and claim that it's vital.
why do we work?
for these things...this collected junk.
we say we need to eat, we need shelter
but in what capacity?
surely not the way we think we do.
and i am learning that now, as i struggle to pay off junk i no longer even own
along with the junk i do...
...wondering why i ever though i needed all of it in the first place.
and what of "need"?
what a strange creature it it is.
like a woman with may children
the mother of all need being simple: food, protection from the elements, oxygen
then there is her lover: companionship, comfort, knowledge....
and all their little bastard children: status, power, safety, stability, peace of mind, on and on...
and these children have all inbred and had mutant children of their own, like clothes, books, ipods, cars, blenders, washing machines, sofas, ice cream, matches...
we all choose which needs we invite to live with us.
i need to ween out the bastard children and their mutant spawn.
and be left with just the woman and her lover.
eating in a house
breathing each others breath
and understanding the profoundness of it all.
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