Saturday, May 4, 2013

love story

once upon a time there was a lonely girl.
though she had a boyfriend and a dog she longed for companionship.
her dog was great, but they were sort of thrown together out of happenstance, and their personalities clashed a bit. and boyfriend, well, they come and go
now, this girl had long ago decided that she did not want children of her own, but something in her was whispering that adoption was the answer.
a baby to raise as her own. a new beginning.
she talked it over with her boyfriend and they decided to start looking.

a puppy.

but what kind?
it had to be a shelter dog. an unwanted critter. someone who needed a home as badly as she wanted to give it one.
(-see, the girl is partial to the worlds unwanted. the misfits. the sadder the story, the more likely she is to adore it. more than once she has been compared to king moonracer, that lion who runs the island of misfit toys, you know the guy.)
anyway, she was leaning toward an italian greyhound or a french bulldog, something smaller, yet stout. packable.
then one day when she was all alone and half asleep listening to the song "jezebel" she had thoughts of a white pitbull running down a gravel road.
decision made.
the search began.

after months of pouring over rescue sites looking for this specific creature finally one was available.
one of a litter born in a rescue in huntly, illinoise. about 300 miles away from home.
.the adoption fee for dogs at this shelter was $300, plus a required vet check up, which would cost another $150, approximately.
were they rich?
hardly.

did they drive the five hours to go pick up a puppy?
indeed.

once at the shelter it was brought to the girls attention that the entire litter was adoptable, and did she want to see them?
into a room of puppies she went, and every one was adorable.
just about to make a decision to take a sister of the original puppy she saw online home, that particular puppy waddled over, plopped down in her lap, looked up at her upside down (a move he still uses to this day) and waggled and wiggled and it was love.
from that moment on the girl would remain smitten for the rest of her days

it wasn't all sunshine and roses, though.
this dog ate socks and curtains, sometimes puking an entire sock up for privileged customers at work.
he completely excavated the entire back yard until no grass remained, and, most traumatically, be began to fight with the other dogs.
the fighting reached a point to where one dogs injuries were so bad he needed to be put down, another other dog was given a new home.
a decision had to be made, and this four year old dog was almost returned to the shelter from whence he came....but that never happened.

see, the dog did something for the girl. he gave her something to live for when she was in desperate need.
when love came and love left the dog stayed.
when her mind melted into a puddle on the floor, the dog just sat in her lap like nothing was different.
when her home was almost foreclosed, she knew she would be ok so long as she had her dog.
no matter what she needed to keep going because her dog needed her, but up until then she didn't realize how much she needed the dog.
her companion,
gardening partner,
exploration sidekick,
napping buddy,
 friend.


that is basically the short version of the love affair i have with my dog.
thanks obi, for taking such good care of me while i've been sick and hurting.
thanks for being a good dog.








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Sunday, April 14, 2013

good morning (tonight)

i had this dream of discontent,
longing,
loneliness.

then i woke up.

and now i almost feel in a state of limbo.
like after you have one of those vivid dreams you aren't completely sure what is dream and what is memory
those dreams you feel...
 
but  im awake.
groggy
stumbling
but awake
and doing the progressive things wakers do when they leave sleep to grow cold on the sheets.

it's difficult, though.
sometimes i feel those dreams i left behind.
not the sleeping ones, but  those wakeful disillusions we want to will into reality
but just cant manifest.

i feel their loss
and it hurts my heart.

but i have a doggie, and great friends
and plenty to occupy my mind and my hands

so it's time to drink the mornings coffee
and move on from dreams and helpless sleep
and take hold of my day
my moments
my life.


hello world
 i'm back.